SwagVault MMO Blog

“I want to be called Lorretta!”.

The other day Ellenor asked if we could create a few additional characters to populate a kinship, to stop it from folding. A noble cause I’m sure you’ll agree. This afford me a great opportunity to indulge in a bit of online transvestism (if that’s a proper word?). Yes like most men I’ve always wondered what it would like to be a woman, but with a blokes mentality. Please meet Lorretta.

I’m sure this speaks volumes about men and in particular my Freudian psychology. Lorretta is a large breasted, trashy slut, gold digging, no good tramp (ooh what a long list of pejorative, sexist terms we have there). This is because my Mother was a professional wrestler and I never got a train set as a child. I did not consciously give a great deal of thought to how Lorretta looked, when I created the character. Although I do admit that she does look like a girl I use to know at college. She however was not a burglar nor ran as sexily.

It was also interesting to note that virtually the moment I arrived in Archet, a LOTRO virgin to most folks eyes, I started getting IMed heavily by libidinous, teenage blokes, who seemed to assume that I was exactly like my avatar, with a morally casual attitude. Men, I now realise that they are such bastards! None of them have ever written since. So keep an eye out for Lorretta online and try not to think to hard about it if she pinches you bum. Also ponder the deeper issues of gender fascism and body politics. No on second, thoughts, don’t. It is only a game.